What causes every leader : the five temptations of leadership – Part 2

In Part 1 of the blog series "Why every leader : The five temptations of leadership," we examined the following three temptations of leadership:

• Result vs. status
• responsibility . popularity
• Clarity vs. Security

Today we will take a closer look at the fourth and fifth temptations:

• Conflict vs. Harmony
• Trust vs. inviolability

Fourth temptation: Conflict versus harmony

Are you familiar with meetings that have a feel-good atmosphere? leader who find it difficult to critically examine issues and demand the same from their employees? This is a clear indication that the leader has succumbed leader fourth temptation: striving for harmony.

Harmonious coexistence is a basic human need. Steering a boat on calm waters is much easier than in a raging storm. So why engage in conflict at work? Too much harmony hinders productive, respectful conflict. It is not about arguing or putting other people down. Rather, the focus is on facilitating a passionate exchange of views. The best and most sustainable decisions can only be made after all perspectives, opinions, and challenges have been clearly identified and discussed. Use all resources at your disposal to achieve this. Make the best source of information available to you your servant: your employees.

Which beliefs and objections often stand in the way of a culture of debate in practice? Many leader , for example, leader afraid that employees will take the issue personally. Often, the emotions of the participants prevent a constructive exchange. In addition, leader do not know how to professionally manage and lead a debate. Having failed a few times, they shy away from conflict. They promote harmony where debate is needed. Consider whether employees in an organization who have a strong need to engage in productive conflict feel understood and supported. As soon as harmony dominates and debate is avoided, these employees will turn away and become resigned. They will wither like a plant without water.

Fifth temptation: Trust versus invulnerability

Do you know people who project an image of invulnerability? People who always want to be strong and never admit weakness? Do you trust these people? As soon as leader succumb leader fifth temptation, they tend to project an image of strength in front of their employees. Often, they don't want to be vulnerable. Neither for their own weaknesses nor for self-inflicted failures. That would weaken their status. The question is: Do employees trust leaders who exemplify such behavior? My clear answer: No!

How can a leader encourage leader to admit their weaknesses and engage in discussion if they themselves are unable to do so? People are more likely to open up about their personal concerns, needs, feelings, problems, fears, and critical comments when there is an atmosphere of trust. This depends largely on how weaknesses are dealt with within an organization. As leader , ask leader employees to help you minimize your own weaknesses and mistakes. There is no better way to build trust than to admit your own vulnerability.

I completely agree with you when you say that overcoming this temptation causes fear and pain. Yes, it is truly painful! However, it is immensely liberating to talk openly about your own weaknesses. Believe me: your fellow human beings will not let you down...

My very personal story about the fifth temptation

As leader and blogger, I always have one goal: before I write about topics, I want to have not only intellectually grasped them, but also understood them emotionally. Before I dealt with the five temptations, I too presented an image of invulnerability to those around me. I deliberately wanted to radiate strength. I wanted others to think well of me. I communicated my strengths—but not so much my weaknesses.

Then I deliberately stepped out of my comfort zone: since then, I have been discussing my weaknesses with my partner, family, friends, and colleagues. Things that I find difficult. Situations in which I have failed. I also open up about personal circumstances that I would otherwise have kept to myself.

The result: my fellow human beings have responded to my vulnerability with respect, goodwill, and genuine interest. They feel more drawn to me and approach me of their own accord to help me overcome these weaknesses. I have come to understand emotionally that there is no action that creates more trust and shows more humanity than allowing myself to be vulnerable. A wonderful realization.

Your emotions regarding the five temptations

Now that you have learned about the five temptations, think about which temptation you have a strong emotional response to:

1. Result versus status
2. responsibility popularity
3. Clarity versus security
4. Conflict versus harmony
5. Trust versus inviolability

Have you identified a temptation for yourself? What impact would it have on your effectiveness and results if you continued to stay on the left side? What problems could you avoid or what opportunities could arise?

The magic of the reverse effect

How often does it happen that, when results fail to materialize, panic-stricken meetings are called in which leader employees discuss possible reasons and causes? What follows is often a flurry of activity. Nothing sustainable usually happens. In order to achieve lasting impact and results, it makes sense to read the model of the five temptations in reverse. Only then do the mutual influences of the principles become visible. So, when analyzing mistakes, we don't start with the results, but with the inviolability of people:

When I, as leader , give up leader invulnerability and openly admit my weaknesses, people find it easier to relate to me. This builds trust. Mutual trust is the basis for entering into open and transparent, productive, and respectful discussions. Once the storm has passed and the team has weathered the "cleansing storm," harmony can emerge. Discussions lead to greater clarity. Being able to make decisions promptly, even without absolute certainty, also leads to clarity. And clarity gives managers the opportunity responsibility employees responsibility for results. When people know what they are responsible for, they can also produce results. In the long term, these results are the only measure of a successful, effective leader.

Overcoming the five temptations:

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